diy: natural styling gel for curls

I love my curls. Most people tell me they love my hair and then ask me if I hate it. I guess most people assume that we always want what we don’t have (in my case, straight hair), but that is not the case for me at all. I suppose there was a time when I struggled with my curly hair. I got teased in school and it took me a long time, testing a zillion products (all claiming to tame the frizz) to finally find a routine that works. I don’t even want to think about the amount of money I spent.

I prefer not to beat my hair into submission. Spending hours with a blow dryer and flat iron does not seem like a good time to me…and well, I have better things to do. I run into so many seemingly straight-haired girls who tell me that they have natural curls, but if they let their hair go curly it would never look like mine. Well, ok, it probably wouldn’t look exactly like mine because we’re all different, right? That’s what makes the world an interesting place. But, I would argue that your curls can look awesome with a few simple tricks. One of mine is flax seed gel.

I learned how to make it a few years ago when I used to frequent the boards of naturallycurly.com.

It’s really pretty easy.  Go grab the following:

• a small saucepan and spoon
• a fine mesh strainer
• flax seeds
• water
• a container for storage
• *optional*: citric acid, essential oil

Ok, have you gathered all your supplies?  Good.  Let’s get started.

1. First, boil about 2 cups of water on the stovetop.
2. Once the water is boiling, add about 1/2 cup of flax seeds and turn the heat down to med-low.
3. Simmer the flax seeds for up to 10 minutes.  DON’T walk away!  You really gotta watch this stuff once it starts simmering.  It can get thick pretty quickly and if you cook it too long you won’t be able to strain it.
4. It’s ready when the liquid thickens, sticks to your spoon, and has a snotty consistency.  Sorry, I can’t really think of a better comparison.  It really does look like snot.
5. Once you think it’s ready, strain out the seeds with the fine mesh strainer and collect your gel in a storage container.
6. Now you have a few options.  This stuff will go rancid (and stinky) if it’s left on the shelf.  You can either store it in the refrigerator or add about 1/4 tsp of citric acid to act as a preservative.  You can also add a few drops of essential oil to add fragrance.  I prefer to store mine in the fridge because it stays thicker.  I’ve found that if I add citric acid and keep it on the shelf, it tends to get runny, but this method is good if you want to travel with it and don’t have access to a fridge.

Ok, now you have your amazing curly hair gel.  Next, the trick is applying it.  One of my favorite things about this stuff is that it doesn’t make your hair crunchy or sticky.  To get the best results, you have to use a lot of it.  Don’t be afraid to use too much.  I use it in combination with a technique called plopping.  Once I’ve plopped for about 10 minutes, I just scrunch a couple of palms full of this gel into my hair.  It’s ok if your hair feels a little slimy.  Now let your hair air dry and when it’s dry or almost dry, you can turn your head upside-down and scrunch it a little to soften any crunchiness that might have formed.  You could blow-dry with a diffuser, but I rarely do this.

Viola!  You are going to have awesome curls!

So, do you have natural curls?  Do you embrace them or fight them?  What do you do to tame the little beasties?

diy: flax seed gel for curls

I love my curls. Most people tell me they love my hair and then ask me if I hate it. I guess most people assume that we always want what we don’t have (in my case, straight hair), but that is not the case for me at all. I suppose there was a time when I struggled with my curly hair. I got teased in school and it took me a long time, testing a zillion products (all claiming to tame the frizz) to finally find a routine that works. I don’t even want to think about the amount of money I spent.

I prefer not to beat my hair into submission. Spending hours with a blow dryer and flat iron does not seem like a good time to me…and well, I have better things to do. I run into so many seemingly straight-haired girls who tell me that they have natural curls, but if they let their hair go curly it would never look like mine. Well, ok, it probably wouldn’t look exactly like mine because we’re all different, right? That’s what makes the world an interesting place. But, I would argue that your curls can look awesome with a few simple tricks. One of mine is flax seed gel.

I learned how to make it a few years ago when I used to frequent the boards of naturallycurly.com.

It’s really pretty easy.  Go grab the following:

• a small saucepan and spoon
• a fine mesh strainer
• flax seeds
• water
• a container for storage
• *optional*: citric acid, essential oil

Ok, have you gathered all your supplies?  Good.  Let’s get started.

1. First, boil about 2 cups of water on the stovetop.
2. Once the water is boiling, add about 1/2 cup of flax seeds and turn the heat down to med-low.
3. Simmer the flax seeds for up to 10 minutes.  DON’T walk away!  You really gotta watch this stuff once it starts simmering.  It can get thick pretty quickly and if you cook it too long you won’t be able to strain it.
4. It’s ready when the liquid thickens, sticks to your spoon, and has a snotty consistency.  Sorry, I can’t really think of a better comparison.  It really does look like snot.
5. Once you think it’s ready, strain out the seeds with the fine mesh strainer and collect your gel in a storage container.
6. Now you have a few options.  This stuff will go rancid (and stinky) if it’s left on the shelf.  You can either store it in the refrigerator or add about 1/4 tsp of citric acid to act as a preservative.  You can also add a few drops of essential oil to add fragrance.  I prefer to store mine in the fridge because it stays thicker.  I’ve found that if I add citric acid and keep it on the shelf, it tends to get runny, but this method is good if you want to travel with it and don’t have access to a fridge.

Ok, now you have your amazing curly hair gel.  Next, the trick is applying it.  One of my favorite things about this stuff is that it doesn’t make your hair crunchy or sticky.  To get the best results, you have to use a lot of it.  Don’t be afraid to use too much.  I use it in combination with a technique called plopping.  Once I’ve plopped for about 10 minutes, I just scrunch a couple of palms full of this gel into my hair.  It’s ok if your hair feels a little slimy.  Now let your hair air dry and when it’s dry or almost dry, you can turn your head upside-down and scrunch it a little to soften any crunchiness that might have formed.  You could blow-dry with a diffuser, but I rarely do this.

Viola!  You are going to have awesome curls!

So, do you have natural curls?  Do you embrace them or fight them?  What do you do to tame the little beasties?

Our Life Since Then (Surviving a Miscarriage)

It’s been about a month since we lost our son and I can’t say that I am an expert on recovering from miscarriage, but I am at least feeling better and finding ways to move forward. This kind of loss is so personal and I think everyone handles it differently, but I wanted to share some things that have helped me so far because I know that overwhelming feeling that comes in waves…”How am I going to get through this?”

The first week was the hardest, but fortunately, Michael was home with me and we were able to just grieve together and to allow ourselves to feel whatever we were feeling.  We had a few “normal” moments, but for the most part, we struggled.  After about a week, I wrote about my experience and posted it here.  That was very cathartic for me and I feel like a weight lifted after that. We are very fortunate to have a lot of amazing people around us (and far away) who showered us with phone calls, flowers, gifts, food, prayers and love. It was so comforting to be able to lean on the people we love. For me, it has also been helpful to seek out others who have been in the same situation.  I joined a facebook group and some online forums that are specifically for parents who have experienced loss.  There is something very healing about being able to share your experience with someone who knows your pain and it’s even more healing to be able to offer encouragement to others as they are going through their darkest hours.

One of the biggest realizations I had during both of my miscarriages was just how precious my daughter is to me.  When I found out I was pregnant with her, it felt like a miracle.  I had tried for so long and had been through so much before she came along.  It almost seemed selfish to hope or ask for another child, but we always thought we would have another one and really wanted Evelyn to have a sibling.  We were very intentional, right from the beginning, about the items we purchased (everything gender neutral) and the way we set up the nursery.  We had always anticipated that there would be one more.  But, after two losses, back to back, we are just not sure if we will continue to try to expand our family.  We aren’t ready to take any permanent measures of prevention, but we are definitely planning to take time to heal from this loss and weigh the pros and cons of trying again…or not. As much as I wanted another child, I have always felt that if I only ever had Evelyn, that would be enough for me.  I don’t want the weight of this loss to impact my relationship with her, so I am doing my best to maintain life as usual.  April has been full of Easter preparations and trying to enjoy the warmer weather.  I’m taking pictures again…I know that sounds weird, but I used to take so many pictures of Evelyn and over the past 6 months, I had just kind of stopped.  For me, that’s a sure sign that something is wrong.  I decided it’s time to take pictures again, to experience life as it happens and to really appreciate all that I have.

Keeping the faith has been a priority for me.  I have been down some very difficult roads before and I recognize that these are the times to draw close to God and grow in Him. The first week after we lost our baby was hard. Really hard. On a cerebral level, I knew all the things that people say to be true.  It happened for a reason. God had a plan and would use the situation for good.  But, I was mad at Him. I needed to be mad at Him for a period of time.  Despite my anger with God, I didn’t run away from Him.  I went to church on Sunday, two days after I got out of the hospital.  I started reading some devotionals that centered around grief and loss.  I prayed…constantly. I talked to God and told Him about every fear, every regret, every pain.  I asked Him why, over and over. I still do from time to time. I know that God can use this situation for good in my life and that He can use my experience to help other people. I don’t know what that will look like just yet, but I pray about it every day.

There was never any doubt that we would have to find a way to honor our baby.  He was real to us, our child, not just a fetus…whatever that means.  We got to see him and hold him.  We dreamed about who he would be and how he would complete our family. I had just begun to feel movement in my belly and we took pictures of him when he was born.  We had named him and talked to our daughter about all the cool things she would do with her little brother. The hospital staff who worked with us were incredible and they gave us a box which contained all kinds of keepsakes, a tiny blanket and hat, poems, a necklace and other items.  We added our ultrasound photos, pictures that we took, the little outfit I bought when I found out we were having a boy and, eventually, we will add the tiny urn that holds his ashes.

I am also planning to dedicate a little section of our garden to the angels we have lost.  Some friends of mine put together a gift basket for us and it contained some seeds and a decorative stone, so I am excited to get started on that as the weather warms up.  I also ordered this adorable necklace, as a way to represent our family of angels, both here on earth and in heaven.

Several months ago, when we were caught in the throes of an endless winter, we reserved a little cabin for a weekend getaway in the woods. Our weekend is coming up soon and it has been nice to have something to look forward to. It will be nice to get away from our familiar surroundings, go hiking, enjoy the outdoors, sit by the fire at night, play games, and cut ourselves off from our cell phones and Netflix. We’ve also been thinking a lot about some day trips that we can take with Evelyn this summer and possibly a getaway for just Michael and me around the time of our anniversary. It’s helpful to be able to think about the future in a positive way instead of always dwelling on what could have been.

I know that there will still be difficult days ahead and that healing happens moment to moment.  So, I think one of the most important things to do, if you are faced with loss, is to just give yourself time.  Don’t expect to feel better tomorrow, or next week, or next month, but know that you will feel better, in your own time.  As I have talked with friends who have been through miscarriage, we have been able to say that we are better, stronger people for having known and lost our angels.  If you are going through this now, take heart. We will never forget, but slowly, it does get easier.

Staining a Bathroom Cabinet

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Phase one of my bathroom makeover is complete!  I finally finished staining the vanity cabinet, which has gone from this dated honey oak….

…to this much more tolerable espresso finish.

I’m still having a hard time believing that I actually did this and that it turned out so nice.  It was so easy…just a little bit time consuming since I had to put on so many coats and then wait for them to dry.  So, how did I do it?  I’m glad you asked.

First, I gathered the following items:

•  Java Gel Stain by General Finishes I bought the 1/2 pint and that would work even for a much bigger cabinet.  A little goes a long way!
• A few tube socks
• Rubber or latex gloves
• Some painter’s pyramids
• Painter’s tape
• Sandpaper
• Screwdriver
• 1/2 pint of polyurethane
• A foam brush

You will want to start by prepping the cabinet.  I put painter’s tape on the walls to protect them from stain and I didn’t worry about protecting the carpet because I am going to rip it out anyway.  I removed the hardware from the door and drawers and removed them from the rest of the cabinet.  Then, I lightly sanded every surface.  You don’t have to go crazy here, you just want to scuff up the surface a bit so that the stain can adhere to the wood.  Once everything is sanded, wipe it down with a damp rag to remove any dust, dirt, or grime on the surface.

Now, you’re ready for the stain.  I got the idea to do this from another blog called Monica Wants It and you can find it by clicking here.  I found her tutorial on Pinterest and she recommends using tube socks instead of a brush to apply the stain.  We always have a few stray socks around here that are missing a mate, so I didn’t have to look far to find some.  I put a glove on my right hand (to protect it from the stain) and then covered it with a sock.  Then I just dipped the sock into the stain and started applying it to the cabinet.  Once you start applying, you will begin to see how much you need.  Start out with a very small dab and then smear it around to see how much coverage you will get.  That will help you gauge how much to use.  Be careful to smooth out any globs.  I used the painter’s pyramids here to prop up the door and drawers after I applied the first coat.  The first coat looked a bit streaky and weird, but in my opinion, it was already a huge improvement from where I started.

First coat

So, I let the first coat dry for about 24 hours and applied the second coat the next evening.

Second coat

I think you could probably apply the third coat in another 24 hours, but I didn’t have the opportunity to work on it again until the weekend, so it dried for about 4 days before I applied the final coat.

Once I had the third coat on, I probably could have added another coat to make it really nice and dark like many of the other photos I have seen online, but I kind of liked the subtle variations in color and being able to still see the wood grain a bit.

Once you have achieved the color you want, let the stain dry for several days before you seal it with the polyurethane.  Life got a little busy around here, so I didn’t have an opportunity to work on it for a few weeks.  I finally was able to apply a few coats of polyurethane.  The tutorial I followed suggested that you can continue to use a sock to apply the polyurethane, but I decided to use a foam brush.  This seemed to work fine and I didn’t have any trouble.  Again, just be careful to smooth out any drippy spots.

Finally, once the polyurethane dried (about 24 hours), I was able to add some new hardware and reattach the door and drawers.  So, here’s the official before and after.  What do you think?

 I love the update!  Michael likes it so much that he wants me to do the same in our downstairs bathroom.  I’m not sure I’m that ambitious.  One project at a time please.

letting go (allowing kids to take risks)

I have a feeling that the older Evelyn gets, the more “letting go” posts I will be writing.  It seems that from the time they are born, parenting is just a process of letting go, little by little, of our children.

As a first time mom and self-proclaimed worry wort, I am sometimes hyper-vigilant about protecting my child from any possible pain.  Not just imminent pain, but hypothetical pain.  If I could wrap her in an invisible bubble, and shield her from all the heartache this world has to offer, believe me I would.  I worry enough for the whole family and sometimes I worry that my worrying will effect her in a negative way.  Evelyn is already a very sensitive, cautious child.  (I wonder where she gets it?)  She observes, she plans, and she’s not a big risk-taker.  I haven’t done much baby-proofing in my house because I didn’t have to.  She has never really tried to get into the cabinets, climb on the furniture, or pull the dog’s ears.  While it’s been awesome to have such an easy child, I also worry (there I go again) that she is too cautious…and when life does bring her disappointment or pain, she doesn’t handle it very well.  She’s not one to brush it off and keep on going.  But that’s something I want her to learn.  I want her to sometimes take risks and to learn to get back up and keep going if she falls.

This weekend the temps climbed into the 50s and the sun shone bright across cloudless, sapphire skies.  It was perfect for getting out of the house to relieve our cabin fever.  We decided to venture out for a walk in our neighborhood.  There’s an alley that runs by our house.  It climbs uphill past some neighbors and Evelyn loves to walk up and run back down.  Every time she wants to run down that hill, I worry.  What if she falls?  What if she knocks her front teeth out?  Every single time we start to descend that hill, my desire to keep her safe from pain wrestles with my understanding that she needs to be able to run and have fun without me shouting, “Be careful!” after her all the time.

This time, as she started to run, the worrier in me started to fear the worst, but instead, I fought that feeling and ran next to her, enjoying the huge smile on her face as her hair flapped behind her.  She was having so much fun and I didn’t want to ruin that moment of freedom for her by imposing my own worries on her psyche.  She triumphantly made it to the bottom of the hill and I was feeling good about myself that I had allowed her to take that risk.  Then she wanted to do it again.  This time she ascended the hill with her daddy.  I poised myself at the bottom of the hill and pulled out my camera so that I could capture the huge smile on her face as she neared the bottom.  I never got to take that picture because about halfway down the hill, she fell.

Her daddy scooped her up and she immediately went into a breath-holding spell.  The words started to come out of my mouth, wanting to blame it on someone, “That’s why I hate the idea of her running….” but then I stopped.  What good what it do?  She had taken a risk, she had fallen, and it was nobody’s fault.  All we could do was pick her up and assess the damage, and help her to move on.  The damage came in the form of a large goose egg on her forehead with no damage to the rest of her face or teeth.  Typically, after a breath-holding spell she gets very tired and since she hadn’t napped, we had to fight to keep her awake for a few hours, until I felt comfortable allowing her to go to bed.  For awhile, nothing could soothe her pain, but when I asked her if she wanted to help me make some cookies in the kitchen, she brightened up and was right as rain in a few minutes.  Later, I showed her the bump in the mirror and she looked at it strangely, but didn’t seem to care.  The next morning, I asked her what happened to her head, wondering if she would remember the incident.  She struggled to even remember that there was anything wrong with her head.

This letting go thing is going to be an ongoing struggle for me.  As she grows, and starts taking bigger risks, I will have to grow too. Sometimes letting go means having to watch your child get hurt.  This made me think of all the times my mom had to sit back and watch while I took risks and made mistakes, from my trips to Europe to my relationship decisions.  She probably wanted to tell me all the reasons my choices could end badly, but she didn’t.  She let me learn and let me grow and I built the strength I needed to fly because she didn’t put me in a bubble.  Sometimes things worked out great, and sometimes I fell and got hurt…and then she helped me assess the damage and helped me to move on.  And just as my mom did this for me, I will do my best to carry it forward for Evelyn…because all the best moments require us to let go, cast off our worries, and take a little risk.

What risk had the biggest payoff for you?

How do you handle watching your children take risks?

This post is linked up to Our Sunday Best on Momnivore’s Dilemma!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving from my family to yours!  I hope your day is warm and fuzzy. 🙂

Today, I’m especially thankful for early morning snow angels, great food with great people, and lots of new visitors to my little blog.
 

caring for curls

Recently, while I was out of town for a family event, I was approached by a woman who asked me what I do to make my hair look the way it does.  It wasn’t the first time I’ve been asked this question, and I always stumble over how to respond because a.) I assume most people will think I am crazy when I tell them how I style my hair, and b.)  it could potentially take a very long time to explain.  I have blogged about my hair-care process before, but it’s been awhile since I’ve talked or thought much about it.  It’s kind of just become part of my daily grind.  So, if I’m going to share my methods with her (via facebook and this blog) I figured I’d better update my routine and break it down as simply as I can.  All of this can sound very complicated and time-consuming (and I did spend a lot of time researching different methods and trying out different products), but once you figure out what works best for you, it becomes pretty quick and easy.  So, I’ve compiled some simple steps and rules to follow for taking care of curly hair.

Stop “washing” your hair.  This probably sounds kind of gross to some people, but shampoo contains harsh detergents that strip all of the natural oil off of your hair, making it dry.  One of the reasons that hair becomes frizzy in humid conditions is because it’s seeking moisture and the little strands just start “reaching” out for some hydration.  Hair that is already well-hydrated is less likely to fuzz out.  I use conditioner and the friction from my fingertips to massage my scalp and then rinse it well with warm water.  If my hair starts to feel dull or gets build-up on it, I mix a little baking soda into some conditioner to make a paste and massage it into my scalp, leave it on for a few minutes and rinse.

Boycott silicones.  Silicones can coat your hair, build-up, and weigh it down…and they are found in just about every hair care product out there, including all the ones that claim to tame the frizz.  You have to really check the ingredients on the conditioner you buy.  The most popular silicone you’ll see is dimethicone, but any ingredient ending in -cone can be an offender.  My absolute favorite silicone-free conditioner is Giovanni’s Tea Tree Triple Treat, but right now I’m just using good old Suave Naturals Coconut.  I’ve also used Tresemme Naturals and L’oreal Eversleek.

Learn how to plop (or plunk).  Plopping (aka plunking) has made a drastic difference in my hair.  Basically, you use a towel to place your hair in a permanent scrunch and leave it for several minutes (I leave it while I’m getting dressed and putting on my makeup).  It’s really hard to explain how to do it, but you can find tons of tutorials on YouTube.  Styling my hair upside down is also really helpful in creating a little lift at the roots.  In the shower, I rinse out my conditioner with my head upside down and then scrunch my curls while it’s still sopping wet before plopping it.

Throw away your combs and brushes.  I never use a comb or brush on my hair.  I only use my fingers to detangle while my hair is wet and coated with conditioner and once it’s dry…don’t touch your hair!  Well, except maybe to fluff it a little to give it some body.  I flip my head upside down and scrunch it up toward my scalp to give it a little volume after it’s dried, but I never run my fingers through it.

Flax Seed Gel.  I posted my recipe pretty recently, so click here to get it.  If you are a visual learner like me there are lots of tutorials on youtube for making this awesome styling product.  I love this stuff because it’s so cheap to make, but also because it’s not sticky.  There is nothing worse than touching your hair (I know, I told you not to do that, didn’t I?) and then having sticky hands.  The product gets on everything…your steering wheel, keyboard at work, telephone, blech…I hate that.  With flax seed gel, that doesn’t happen.  You also won’t have “the wet look” or crunchy hair, which I also hate.  Your hair might feel a little stiff after it dries, but you can soften it up by giving it a light scrunch.

Ditch the blow dryer.  Ok, this is not a requirement, but I just prefer to let my hair dry naturally.  I find that blow drying (even with a diffuser) makes my hair frizzier.  But, a lot of curlies use a blow dryer with a diffuser and have great success, so I guess it’s just a personal preference.

Well, that’s about it.  It seems a little complicated, but it’s really very easy and it takes me only a few minutes to style my hair, which is so important to me since I have an 18-month-old toddling around.  Her hair is curly too, by the way, and I apply some of the same principles to styling her hair.  So here’s the result. (Sorry for the bad lighting, bathroom self-portrait):

i heart philly

I’ve been a little MIA for the past week or so and that’s because we’ve been on vacation in Philadelphia.  Well, we were house and dog sitting for my brother-in-law while he was on a tropical vacation.  We poor folk with a young baby have to stay close to home.  Anyway, since Michael’s brother moved to Philly about 3 years ago, it’s been kind of a home away from home for us.  We go to visit and sometimes stay for a week at a time, if we’re holding down the fort, like we did this past week.

I decided not to lug my Nikon DSLR with me, since I have already used it to take a ton of pics there.  This week all my photos were shot using Instagram on my iPhone.

It seems like Evelyn grew by leaps and bounds these past few days.  Looking after her was a bit of a challenge in a house that isn’t baby-proofed, especially since she is super mobile these days.  We tried our best to keep her corralled, but she managed to get into every sort of trouble.  First, she found the stairs…and even made it to the second step on one occasion.

Michael put this box on the floor, so that she could use it for support while standing…then she promptly crawled ON TOP of it.

This is the look I got when I told her “no.”

She had a great time playing with her dad’s shoes (I let this one slide as long as she wasn’t trying to put the shoe in her mouth!)

…and she had no trouble chasing all three dogs off of their bed, so she could play on it.

Despite all the mischief, Evelyn was a trooper.  We dragged her all over the city and she was in her glory most of the time.  I have to admit, it was a little difficult for us to do the things we would normally enjoy doing, because we had to work around her nap times, fussy times, and eating times, and she is too young to really appreciate all the fun kid things to do in the city, but we still managed to do a lot and she was right there along with us, absorbing every minute of it.

One day when we went out, it poured down raining, so we popped the little canopy up on her stroller, covered her lap with a blanket and pressed on.  Michael and I were a little disgruntled, but Evelyn didn’t seem to mind it at all.  When the rain finally stopped and I pulled back the stroller canopy, she was sitting up, taking it all in, and enjoying herself immensely.

She also finally began to sign “more” while we were away.  At first, I though it was a fluke, but then she did it again and again.  We had been signing with her here and there, mostly “more,” “milk,” and “all done,” but I had actually been getting pretty lazy about it.  Now that she seems to be doing a lot more imitating (she waved for the first time to a random lady in the check out line at Ikea), and picking it up, I will definitely start introducing more signs and using them consistently.

So, what did we do while we were in the city?  Well, we had already done all the basic touristy things (Constitution Center, Liberty Bell, Museum of Art, Phillies Game, etc) during previous visits, so we decided to try some low key activities.

One of our favorite places to visit is the Reading Terminal Market, but on the day we decided to stop there, it was closed (duh, it was Labor Day).  That also happened to be the day it rained buckets.  Blah.

Crossing the Ben Franklin bridge into New Jersey, home of our favorite destination…Total Wine!

And more rain…

The neighborhood where we stay is full of little restaurants, cafes, and shops.  We stopped at Cafe Lutecia for breakfast one morning, a little slice of France in the heart of Philly.

We were also located close to the University of Pennsylvania, so we visited the Penn Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology.  The had a special Mayan Exhibit, I’m certain capitalizing on the 2012 Apocalypse theories.

To get to the museum, we had to cross the South Street Bridge, which provides an awesome view of the city.

We visited the 9th Street Italian Market…

…and enjoyed a gelato at 10 o’clock in the morning.

Then we stopped at the Rosenbach Museum and Library, which was featuring the works of Maurice Sendak.  The photo below shows a mural that was painted by Sendak on the wall of a friend’s home.  The painting was donated to the museum and they had to remove the wall of the home in order to put it on display.

Finally, we visited Penn’s Landing, along the Delaware River.

And we couldn’t go to Penn’s Landing without stopping at The Franklin Fountain for some ice cream.  I got the green tea, and even though Evelyn shouldn’t really be having dairy yet, I let her try some anyway.  She gave me this look when I started to eat it and I just couldn’t sit and eat it in front of her.  Needless to say, she loved it!

Ah, well, as much as I love being on vacation, it’s good to be home, surrounded by the familiar.  Where did you vacation this year?

Meet Moxie

Little Miss Moxie is the newest addition to our happy family. We picked her up almost 3 weeks ago at the SPCA. Michael has been bugging me to get a dog ever since we got the cats. I protested for a long time. We travel a lot and the cats are low maintenance. We can leave them for a day or two and they are fine. Not so with a dog. So, Mike would bring it up every so often and each time I would give him the same exact reasons not to get a dog…until a few weeks ago. The SPCA posted some photos on facebook of animals up for adoption and I spotted a beautiful dog. So, after thinking about it for a week or two, we decided to go and have a look. We were told right away that the dog from the photo wouldn’t be good with our cats. So, we decided to look at the other dogs. I always hate to walk the length of the dog kennels. They all start barking and the noise echos through the room and I can just feel the anxiety as soon as I walk through the door. I glanced at the dogs as I passed and spotted the dog from the photo in the very last kennel. She lunged toward us and barked fiercely. I knew that she wasn’t for us right away and by this time, my own anxiety level was mounting so I needed to get out of there as soon as possible. On my way out, I spotted a little black dog with tan markings. She barked at me a little, but nothing over the top. I pointed her out to Mike and made my way for the door.

The ladies at the shelter brought her out to see us. She was so happy and playful. We liked her right away, but I still felt like I needed time to think about it. I knew that bringing a dog home would be a huge commitment and I didn’t want to get her on a whim or feel pressured to do so. At the same time, I knew we would be going back to get her the next day. And we did. And we didn’t have to pay a cent for her, because someone had donated angel adoptions for the holidays. Mike brought her home with a collar and leash and a pet store gift certificate.

We seriously couldn’t have asked for a better dog. She is housebroken, she can be left loose in the house when we aren’t there, and she hasn’t chewed a single thing. She doesn’t bother with the cats, though they seem to be a little annoyed by her presence.

The only thing we have to work on with her is jumping up on us, especially me. She gets really excited when I come home, or wake up in the morning, or when I’m getting ready to take her out. And she is so jealous! Vita used to sit on my lap all the time, but now when she tries to, Moxie is right there, scaring her away.

Of course, already Mike is trying to convince me that we need to get a puppy for her to play with. But I am standing my ground on this one. She has playdates with my sister’s puppy, Leeyah, and they wear each other out. No more pets for us. Our little family is complete…for now.

Looking back…

It’s snowing on the final day of 2009 and I decided to take a vacation day. I had originally intended to head out to work, but the roads were terrible and so I thought, what better way to end the year than cozied up at home, reflecting about the past year? I am not planning to make any resolutions this year. They always seem to fall to the wayside and then I beat myself up for not having the will power to stick to them. But I think it is valuable to look back on what has happened over the past year and think about what may come for the year ahead.

It’s been an interesting year. Things were crazy on the work front. There have been ups and downs, but most importantly, I am learning. It’s my first real experience as a supervisor and I feel like I have come a long way. I had some difficult teachers to work with and I made some mistakes here and there, but I have tried to see it as a learning experience. I am definitely becoming less of a “nice guy.” While it is important to me to have a good relationship with the teachers I advise and to be sensitive to their needs, I am learning that I have to keep a professional distance. It’s a difficult role, but it’s important for what we are trying to accomplish with the children. I am also going to be taking classes this year and hope to begin a master’s program in the fall. It looks like 2010 is probably going to bring more responsibility for me and hopefully more pay and vacation time.

Financially, 2009 wasn’t great, but it wasn’t terrible either and it definitely could have been a lot worse. Going through a divorce and getting laid off put a little bit of a damper on my year, but like I said, it could have been much worse. I did, unfortunately, add a little to my credit card debt and got zero back on my tax return as a result of my ex’s bad choices. On the plus side, I paid off my car loan and consolidated my credit card debt. This year, I will be working on bringing down my credit card debt, getting out from under the mortgage I still share with my ex, and saving whatever I can for whatever may come up.

On a personal note, 2009 was pretty great. My relationship with Michael has grown stronger. We traveled to Florida to visit some of his family and he seems to be integrating nicely into mine. The layoff from work was actually positive in so many ways. I was able to do NOTHING for about 2 1/2 months. I was forced to just let go of some situations that were stressing me out at work and for the first time since I was 16 years old, I didn’t have to work or go to school. It was strangely liberating to be free of obligations, if only for a little while. Everyone in the family seems to be doing well. Chelsea is preparing to go to nursing school, Luke is working on his teaching degree, Jessica seems to like her job and my nephews are growing like weeds. Mom and dad became empty nesters. Oh my! What will they do with themselves?!

I feel like I have come a long way after the divorce. 2008 was a very difficult year and it seems like 2009 was a year for healing. I suppose I still have some things to work on in that area, like anger and forgiveness, but I’m getting there. One of the biggest positives for 2009 is that I became pretty active in the church I am attending. I am teaching Sunday School and I joined a small group, which has turned out to truly be a gift from God. The women in my group are wonderful and I look forward to our meetings every week. A few of us have also started a book club, so I’ll definitely be reading more in 2010.

During most of 2009, I have been dissatisfied with my health and physical state. I am not really having any health problems, but I do want to try to eat healthier and get more exercise in 2010. I just need to do it and that is always a lot easier said than done, but it’s a goal I have for myself.

Well, I remember at this time last year, I was looking forward to starting a new one because 2008 couldn’t have been much worse than it was. This year, looking back on 2009, I feel truly blessed because so many positive things have happened and I have come such a long way. Now, looking at the year ahead, I am optimistic that any upcoming trials or triumphs will turn out just as they are supposed to and I am very much at peace about that.