Recently someone asked me if I have a bucket list. The question caught me like a deer in headlights. I don’t know if it’s because I am in the new mom survival mode, and I can’t even imagine the next time I will do something for myself, or if I’ve already done a lot of things and haven’t had a chance to re-evaluate and set some new goals. Regardless of the reason, I kind of felt like a loser as I struggled to think of a single thing I’d really like to do. I kind of feel like I am in the middle of a mid-life crisis. I really don’t know what I want to do with myself in the years to come. I’ve been traveling along in the here and now for the past few years.
The question reminded me of a little notebook that I have packed away somewhere. In the back of it, I had started a bucket list of sorts when I was in my early 20s. I decided to dig it out to remind myself of the aspirations of my younger self. Apparently, when I started the list, I intended to have 100 items on it, but I only managed to fill up 56 of them. Those of you who know me know that I am not a risk-taker. Putting this blog out for the world to see is about as risky as it gets for me. There is no bungee-jumping, rock climbing, or skydiving on my list. I chuckled to myself as I read it, a reflection of who I was at the time and how different life was only 12 years ago.
I’ve managed to cross off many of the items over the years such as
- Get my degree
- Own a home
- Have a child
Some of the items got deleted, mainly because I lost interest in those things, such as
- Take salsa lessons
- Learn Italian
- Live in a big city
So, is there anything on the list that I still want to do? I have to admit that the idea of keeping this list is a little scary. What if I never accomplish my goals? But, it’s my list and I can do what I want. The only person I have to answer to is me.
Mainly, I just really want to see my child(ren) grow into happy, well-adjusted, compassionate, caring people. And that’s not a passive goal to have. That’s going to take a lot of work on my part. But a few things jumped out at me that I’d like to see through.
- Visit Europe again – I studied abroad in France in college and I’d love to go back.
- Learn to knit – my grandma is a pro and I really need to ask her to teach me.
- Finish my dollhouse – I’ve had this thing since I was 3 years old and I’d love to pass it on to Evelyn.
- Become a foster parent – I’d like to have one more child of my own, but I’ve been thinking about foster parenting for years now.
- Become a stay-at-home mom – I love my job, but I love the idea of being at home with my kid(s) even more.
There are many other items that I will keep in the list. It’s fun to look back every once in awhile to see what I’ve accomplished and to add new aspirations as they arise.
Do you have a bucket list?